2 months

Cole came home with us two months ago and although I'm not ready to begin the regular happy days of blogging yet, I did want to document this day. Yes, it's the 2 month anniversary of when we stepped off that plane and began this new adventure as a family of 5 but today is also the first day we had no screaming (from either Cole or me!). The first day where we enjoyed ourselves from morning to night! And although he did start to whine when I stood up once to put away laundry, something in me handled it differently.

I confessed openly recently that I have been shown that so much of my struggles this summer were not about Cole after all. Not about a grumpy, whiny child who would not be happy but instead, these trials and intense moments of frustration have been about me! In my arrogance, my expectations for having a 3rd child were extremely inaccurate and having thought myself to be a good mother, capable and patient, I now see my weaknesses overwhelming what little strengths I have.

But I can rejoice in this! 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 shows me that in my repentance & submission, I am now in a place of victory, ready to move forward in service of this adorable little boy who gives nothing in return.

"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

The difference in me today was submission to the Holy Spirit, allowing Him to empower me to be the mother He has asked me to be! Now each day is going to be another opportunity to submit or to struggle and there may be days when I submit and still struggle. But I have hope again and that is power in itself.